29 Jun 2019
01.06.19 | The Things I Want To Remember
The anticipation being too much and struggling to get back to sleep once awake at 4am.
Baba O’Riley – The Who playing on the radio whilst G was in the shower.
Forgetting to bring butter to the Airbnb so having scrambled eggs on dry toast for breakfast which I struggled to eat because my stomach was trying to birth approx. 456 butterflies.
Being ready for people to arrive about an hour earlier than planned cos eager.
My dad and Elizabeth popping over at the exact moment we realised we were ready too early.
My mum and Andrew arriving with the flowers and them being so bloody beautiful.
My Auntie Jane & Grandma popping over and all of us sitting around with a cup of tea, all super chilled.
Taking my Grandma into the next room just the two of us to show her my wedding dress in person for the first time and her giving me a little squeeze.
Alice arriving and suddenly making it all feel more real, remembering we weren’t just having a family catch up.
Saying bye to Gary and jokingly making him promise to show up.
Having my hair and make-up done and realising that I was actually feeling super relaxed and happy.
Sitting in the bedroom with my mum, cousin Clare and Alice and nattering whilst I had my hair done.
All the bridesmaids beginning to arrive and the apartment being filled with plenty of women laughing and chatting.
Listening to my mum and Becca having an hilarious amount of fun using a hand held steamer on the dresses.
Wandering around in my pjs with hair and make-up done and Lizzie feeding me marshmallows. Cos why not?
The girls and I getting way too excited over the ‘cheeses of the world’ print Lizzie’s parents gave us, which I opened that morning.
Laughing at my mum practising walking in her heels in the bedroom and tripping on the first step.
My mum and sister helping me into my dress; my mum flapping over doing up the obscene amount of buttons (requiring a crochet hook) and my sister being like ‘chill!’
The photographer musing how me getting into the dress would have been a great photo if I wasn’t so naked.
Heading into the main room so everyone could see me in the dress for the first time and all my bridesmaids being lined up in their dresses waiting for me, and squealing when I came in.
Everyone constantly telling me how hot it was outside.
The sheer faff of trying to get in and out the car in such a big dress.
Appreciating the air conditioning in the car after only being outside for approx. 10 seconds. Turns out we got married on the hottest day of the year.
Waiting to walk down the aisle and my mum already crying.
Walking into the room, something I was always not looking forward to, and finding myself simply excited to see everyone.
Suddenly experiencing tunnel vision at the exact moment Gary turned around at the top of the aisle, the last person to do so, and the image feeling like a scene out of a film.
Gary excitedly reaching out to hold my hand as I reached the top of the aisle.
Leaning my head against Gary’s shoulder whilst my friend Jordan did a reading – he absolutely nailed it.
Getting. Bloody. Married.
Kissing Gary for the first time as a married couple.
The cheers, clapping and whistles of our family and friends when we were pronounced ‘wife and husband’, which felt like it went on for so long (in a good way).
The flash of the pen as we signed the register – official just like that.
Seeing my friend Dan for the first time as he came over to sign the register as one of our witnesses, and muttering to each other about how much we were sweating.
The registrar telling us that traditionally, I was to walk on Gary’s left, so he could keep his ‘sword hand’ free.
Handing my dad the marriage certificate because he was right in front of us and then promptly forgetting all about it. Good job he kept a close eye on it.
The looks on my mum & Andrew’s faces when they clocked that we were walking back down the aisle to Ride A White Swan by T-rex, the same as they did.
The first sip of cold champagne at the end of the aisle.
My dad and Jordan being the first ones to reach us and say congrats.
The accidental queue that seemed to suddenly form of people wanting to hug us and say congratulations.
Wandering around in a happy daze saying hello to so many of my favourite people.
My cousin Alice, Neve & little Eliza coming over to give me horseshoes and Eliza wanting to hang on to it herself and trying to give me the order of events card instead.
Doing the formal photos and my bridesmaids jumping between wafting their dresses to create a breeze and smiling perfectly for the camera.
Doing a deliberate back-of-dresses photo with the bridesmaids and all of us laughing because ‘er, when do we know it’s okay to turn around again….’ ‘Is anyone else still smiling even though our faces aren’t in this?’
Momentarily getting out onto the balcony and a) having some fresh air and b) looking across the St Albans market.
Walking out of the building and finding Dan, Will, Joe & Guus waiting for us at the door, already clapping – which then got everyone sat in the café outside clapping also.
Walking through the market and the market vendors, and other random people, clapping, shouting out ‘congratulations’ and, amusingly, one shouting ‘it’s not too late love’.
A market vendor offering us a free doughnut but declining cos it felt too early in the day to risk a raspberry doughnut with the white dress.
The constant chatter of bridesmaids voices as they held my train as we walked, usually telling me I was walking too fast for their heels.
Gary holding low tree branches out of our way… only to shower the bridesmaids in leaves.
Walking through the cathedral grounds with the sun shining and a procession of all our friends and family behind us. I imagine we were quite the sight.
Ele shouting ‘funnel girls funnel’ when I went through a narrow gate and they were still holding my dress.
Being showered with confetti in the park. The bridesmaids getting really into the confetti throwing.
Turning around and seeing Sam (HEY SAM) smugly holding a Mr whippy ice cream. Well jel.
Getting to the pub, being handed a glass of prosecco and emerging into the pub garden to see an almighty amount of humous and flatbreads.
Sitting down, sunglasses on, drink in hand, chatting to my girls and thinking this was all pretty swell.
Everyone slowing coming into the garden and settling down; it was perfect beer garden weather. I can’t believe how lucky we got.
Little Louisa taking the job of looking after my bouquet very seriously. I had to give her specific permission to leave it on the bench before she was willing to run off and play.
Being constantly surprised at seeing so many people I loved, from all parts of my life, in the same place, talking to each other.
Saying ‘hello’ into the microphone and everyone immediately cheering.
My dad jokingly shouting out that it’s the first time he’d seen me talk for only a minute before letting someone else in.
Surprising myself by crying at my mum’s speech… and then all the speeches that followed. My mum’s, Dom’s and Gary’s were all absolutely spot on and I have re-watched them several times already.
Catching sight of Lizzie doubling over with laughter at my mum’s speech.
Nina surprising us with a cookbook she’d put together – she’d contacted all our friends and family and asked them to contribute a recipe and it is the most thoughtful gift I have ever received.
Gary referring to me as his ‘gorgeous wife’ for the first time.
Heading inside after the speeches and catching sight of the epic cheeseboard.
The food coming out and looking incredible, and everyone absolutely loving it.
Struggling to eat because of all the hype, but still managing to wolf down some halloumi and steak because, yes so much excitement, but also – still Kate.
Mingling about in the sunshine; this bit is the biggest blur as we were jumping between so many people but I remember being sat in the corner with some of my uni friends, chatting to the RCP gang by the BBQ, admiring Stuart’s flowery shirt, talking to Gary’s work colleagues and inviting them to the new house, and chatting to some of Gary’s school friends and mid-sentence Ness shouting out ‘does your dress have pocket?!’. You bet it does.
Heading off into the park with our photographer to get some couple photos and mostly laughing every time we put our heads together for ‘nose kisses’ because the vibes were less ‘romantic’ and more ‘cross-eyed serial killer’.
Cutting the cake (which was surprisingly hard work through that enormous bottom layer) and laughing as we fed a piece to each other. Gary cutting each layer up surprisingly efficiently and then people losing their shit over it. I tasted the chocolate orange layer and the entire thing was gone when I came back for more about an hour later. Hats off & a massive thank you to Claire & Becca for making it for us; it went down a treat.
The first dance! Which we spent a long time saying we weren’t going to do and then trying not to think about but hey, ya know what, it was upbeat and silly and basically exactly how we dance around the kitchen when we’re alone.
Some of my bridesmaids jumping on the dance floor with their other halves at the exact right moment because I’d previously told them to not leave us on our own too long – feeling like, no matter what, I always got my girls backing me up.
Katie (band singer): we’ll be back for the party set soon
Becca (loudly): you mean this isn’t the party set?!
Katie: girl, you ain’t seen nothing yet
Lizzie drunkenly saying to me ‘Dom’s speech was about friendship and you’re my friend…’ and me cracking up.
Sitting in the dark beer garden, with multi-coloured lights strew across our heads, my dress pulled up over my knees to try and get some air and the kids (all girls) playing a hand clapping game.
Weeing for the first time since the wedding started around half 9 at night (I have no idea how) and Claire and Lizzie having to both hold up the dress whilst I sat on the loo. They had to get through all the layers until Claire shouted ‘I can see the light!’. There was no way we could close the cubicle door so Claire just loudly shouted that ‘the bride’s just having her first piss of the day’ whenever someone came in.
Claire going under the dress to loosen my corset and we made so many weird noises that Lizzie (who was having a wee) shouted out ‘what on earth are you two doing out there?’ Claire told people afterwards that she’d been places that ‘no one but Gary should go’ and I could not stop laughing.
Picking up little Eliza on the dancefloor and her looking mostly bemused as to why we were swinging around.
The band starting to sing ‘Ghost’ by Ella Henderson and us all getting way too into the singing that the lead singer had to stop and be like ‘guys, you’re about a verse ahead’.
The sheer number of epic dance moves being pulled out by some of our friends.
Jordan and Sam both suddenly having their ties wrapped around their heads.
The heat starting to become a bit much and everyone picking up the end of my dress and using it to fan me.
My sister asking me if I had, in fact, left the dance floor at all in the last three hours.
My dad suddenly getting up to dance at the exact moment the Grease medley came on. I have video proof and I ain’t ever gonna let him forget it.
Leaning on a table outside the pub chatting to Dan, Guus & Will as they waited for their taxi. I loved that Gary and I were there right until the end when everything had gone quiet.
Walking up the hill with Ele and Ian with enormous hunks of cheese under our arms because Ele demanded it all be wrapped up and taken away because mustn’t waste cheese.
The image of the bridesmaids walking ahead of us through the cathedral grounds; no shoes, their dresses hitched up and the lights illumining their dresses to make them look kinda ghostly as they walked through the graveyard!
Dropping all the bits and bobs back at the flat and then realising we had to get back down our spiral staircase. There are some cracking pictures of Gary nearly falling over trying to hold up the train of my dress.
Walking through town at the exact same time as the clubs kicked out and getting a lot of extremely intoxicated ‘congratulations’ shouts, plus two different cars winding down their windows as they drove past to cheer us.
Alice undoing all the buttons on my dress surprisingly quickly which was much appreciated as by that point I was about 50% pure sweat.
Collapsing on the bed together and musing as to whether we’d ever be able to feel our feet again.
23 Jun 2019
Hello From The Other Side
Apologies in advance for now having Adele in your head, my bad (although I’m not that sorry cos tbf, it’s a banging tune).
Hello there! Lordy, there’s a lot to discuss. We got married! We spent three weeks in America! We’re moving house! But this is just a hello for now, just as I dip my toe back into real life. Because that is all I am really capable of right now. We lost a night’s sleep on the way home thanks to an incredibly uncomfortable flight and jet lag has hit me like a tonne of bricks. I am doing a very good impression of someone who simultaneously has had several bottles of wine and has a severe hangover so it’s a miracle that I’ve managed to unpack my suitcase let alone anything else. There are four loads of washing to go on, I am back in the office tomorrow and G’s talking about going to the gym this week. Pray for Kate.
So hi, hello, how are ya? There are going to be posts on weddings and California and our imminent move in the foreseeable but for now, I’m off to The Pudding Stop whilst G gives me a judging look like how can you possibly eat more pudding after the last three weeks? It’s like he’s forgotten who he married...
30 May 2019
Wedding Chat (#5) | Brb Off To Get Hitched
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| Photo by Micheile Henderson on Unsplash |
The past few weeks have including a lot of final payments, final meetings, final random tasks (like testing speakers and buying a just-in-case photo-appropriate umbrella). We’ve booked our taxi to Heathrow, have got our dollars ready and the suitcases are down from the loft. Predictably, G has already half filled his whereas my packing will probably be somewhat chaotic and last minute. Why break a habit of a lifetime?
Oh and Saturday’s weather is predicted to be the hottest for the next couple of weeks so if you see a melting blob in a wedding dress around St Albans – hi it me.
I have got used to living with the permanent sensation of butterflies-in-the-stomach over the past couple of weeks as well as the monumental, can’t-really-process feeling of we-are-actually-getting-married.
Given it’s such a big moment, I find myself without very much to say. It’s all tumbling emotion that even I am struggling to put into words. This process has been a right emotional rollercoaster at times. Weddings are funny things, unique things, and I am someone who needs time to reflect at a later date. So no doubt all these thoughts and emotions will be detangled and shaped into words further down the line.
For now, all that’s really left to say is I am beyond excited for the moment our friends and family start to arrive in St Albans tomorrow and every single moment that will follow over the weekend and the three weeks after.
Over and out.
29 May 2019
Our Honeymoon Plans
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So this is a super fun post to write.
The moment G and I got engaged, I was adamant that our honeymoon was going to be pretty epic. Even before he proposed, we’d talked about doing some kind of big state-side trip and I am very excited. The whole reason we allowed ourselves 17 months to plan the wedding was so we could take this long a honeymoon. The wait is (nearly) over!
So two days after our wedding, we will take a little jolly on down to Heathrow airport for a night in the Premier Inn. Doesn’t sound like the most glamorous start to a honeymoon but we’re treating ourselves to a stress-free morning (hopefully), rather than getting up at the crack of dawn to make a 9:30am flight.
New York
If you know me at all, you’ll know NYC is one of my all-time favourite places. We have a whole blissful week there just to chill the heck out as I imagine we’re going to be knackered after the wedding is over. Last time we went, I can remember us saying on the plane home that we would love to come back one day and take a more chilled-out approach to the city. We’ve already ticked off all the tourist sites so we’re planning a living-like-the-locals type week where we take everything at a slower pace and just really enjoy the city. We’re thinking picnics in the park, lazy mornings, lots of slow wanders and ALL THE FOOD.
Things I want to do this time round (in between all the laziness): spend some more time in Brooklyn, see some of Manhattan’s street art, go up the new ‘Vessel’ and head up the Rock at sunset to hopefully see the city from above at golden hour.
California
Hopefully NYC will leave us feeling suitably refreshed because we shall then hop on another plane and fly across the country to, hello, San Francisco! Yes, I am SO EXCITED.
We ummed and ahhhed a lot about how we wanted to see California as it is – to state the obvious – freakin’ enormous and there is so much to see. But neither of us were particularly keen on a road trip and even if we were, we would have realistically needed more time. So we essentially prioritised what we really wanted to see – San Francisco, Yosemite, Wine Country, Redwoods – and went from there. We worked out we could base ourselves in San Fran and see everything whilst still maintaining the right balance of busy & relaxed.
We have treated ourselves to 5 nights in the most expensive hotel we have ever booked (with the most incredible waterfront views of Oakland Bay Bridge) which means we will also spend a few nights in a much cheaper Airbnb! But I quite like the idea of having two different accommodation experiences; we’ll stay in two different parts of the city giving us the chance to experience both. Our Airbnb is on a lovely suburban street full of colourful, San Francisco-style houses and looks super cute.
We’re aiming to spend every other day (4-5 days in total) in San Francisco itself and want to see all the sites (am particularly excited for the Golden Gate Bridge and Alcatraz). On our other days, we plan to get out of the city and see some more of California. We plan to hop on the ferry to Sausalito one day and definitely want to do some hiking in Muir Woods. Can’t wait to see those huge trees. We have a day booked to spend in Wine Country – we’ll be doing a wine tour with the cutest looking company and I am v excited to be drunk on a vineyard. And – omg so excited about this – we have two days booked in Yosemite National Park with a night spent in one of their pre-erected tents. G is half convinced we’ll wake up in the middle of the night with a bear outside and, oh, wouldn’t that be the most epic honeymoon tale ever...
Photo by Element5 Digital on Unsplash
28 May 2019
A Photo A Day | 1 - 15 May 2019
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| 1 May 2019 Location: Peddling Pizza, St Albans market Pizza = life. (Needless to say, I am not on a wedding diet 👍🏻) |
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| 2 May 2019 Location: St Albans Snapped this on my way home from voting which we put off for a while due to the torrential rain; I love the sheer amount of green going on, the colourful playground, the lil church in the background... basically this little scene makes my heart inexplicable happy 🤷🏻♀️ |
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| 3 May 2019 Location: Sheffield Spent a peaceful few days up north and mostly photographed the ginger furbaby 😻 |
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| 4 May 2019 Location: Sheffield Spent a peaceful few days up north and mostly photographed the ginger furbaby 😻 |
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| 5 May 2019 Location: Sheffield Spent a peaceful few days up north |
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| 6 May 2019 Location: Sheffield Spent a peaceful few days up north and mostly photographed the ginger furbaby 😻 |
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| 7 May 2019 Location: Regent's Park, London Spring time in Regent’s Park 😍 |
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| 8 May 2019 Location: Regent's Park, London More spring time in Regent’s Park 😍 |
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| 9 May 2019 Location: Home, St Albans Saying bye to the last of the blossom 🌸📸 |
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| 10 May 2019 Location: St Albans Gareth loves my constant photo-taking and the way it prevents him from eating his food whilst hot... #instagramhusband #whothehellisgareth |
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| 11 May 2019 Location: Home, St Albans Lazy weekend at home; gonna miss these views when we move ⛪️ 🍎 |
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| 12 May 2019 Location: St Albans Lazy weekend at home; gonna miss these views when we move ⛪️ 🍎 |
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| 13 May 2019 Location: St Albans Got an ice cream because it was Monday and the sky looked like this ☀️ |
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| 14 May 2019 Location: London This weather though 😍☀️ |
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| 15 May 2019 Location: Home, St Albans Wednesdays = pizza-from-the-market-days. Even better when the sun shines ☀️🍕 |
22 May 2019
The Highs And Lows Of Planning A Wedding
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| Photo by Clem Onojeghuo on Unsplash |
9 days until we get married. How?
Like a true cliché, the past 17 months have felt like a really long time and yet like no time at all. I think I’m ready to not be planning a wedding now and yet also can’t quite believe it’s already over.
The biggest piece of advice I would give to anyone planning a wedding, now I’ve done it myself, is that it’s okay to have moments of stress. Getting married is supposed to be a happy occasion so I’ve often found myself making stressful situations even more stressful by questioning why I’m feeling stressed rather than enjoying myself (an insight into how my mind works).
There is no point pretending that organising an event for 100+ people isn’t without stresses. And that’s before you throw in the fact that you’re actually getting married which is sorta a once-in-a-lifetime thing and comes with so much emotion. And not just for you; all anyone does for months on end is ask you about it and get excited about it. By the end, it feels virtually impossible to still maintain the ‘just essentially organising a party’ vibe you started out with. BUT – and this is a big but – there has been so much joy. And oh my, the joys are worth the stresses a hundred times over. And I say that even before the actual day. Whilst I wouldn’t want to plan another wedding any time soon, I’m thrilled we are so close to the day and can’t tell you how excited I am for the month of June.
It has felt like a bit of an emotional rollercoaster at times so here are just some of the highs and lows:
High: January 2018 – just after we got engaged – where we basically spent all our time in the pub fleshing out ideas, booking things and generally revelling in the excitement of the fact we’d found a human we wanted to stick with f o r e v e r. I mean, how can that not be exciting?
Low: The sheer amount of things that can cause anxiety. The money, the opinions, the weird concept of everyone you know being in one room, the ‘what if such-and-such goes wrong’ scenarios, the assumed expectations that some will insist on pressing upon you (people are far more traditional than I ever knew), the pressures thrown on women who are getting married to be thin/glowing…. Sigh. Whether you like it or not, this shit is going to come your way and it’s enough to make even the most level-headed person feel anxious. You have to be very good at letting it wash over you which is something of an art.
High: Finding my wedding dress. I was so ready for it to be hard, to not enjoy the experience, to think it would take forever. And it wasn’t any of those things. It was an absolute joy (I wrote a whole blog post about it here).
Low: Navigating opinions. My least favourite thing out of the whole process. Naively, I hugely underestimated the amount of investment – emotional, financial, logistical – that would go into planning a wedding. I didn’t consider how every single detail of the day would require conversations, fleshing out ideas, back-and-forths, planning, logistics…. Every single detail. The flowers in jars on the tables? A conversation has happened to start that train of thought, then discussed with a venue, then agreed, then discussed some more to decide on colours, then the jars have been saved and washed over a period of several months, then carried over to the venue… blah de blah. And I didn’t realise how protective this would make me feel. There is no aspect that you haven’t given thought and effort to. And then someone suggests you do it a different way or implies that’s not how it should be at a wedding… My biggest suggestion when talking to a couple planning a wedding – tell em it all sounds great. Think before offering up your opinion on something that doesn’t affect you. Do not try and explain to them why the football final scheduled for the same day as their wedding is a Big Deal unless you want to be castrated.
High: My lovely, lovely hen do. Genuinely one of the best weekends of my life. I had SUCH a ball. I’d plan a wedding again just to re-live the hen do. An absolute corker. Again, I wrote about it in detail here.
Low: That constant feeling of ‘I should be doing something’. That little bugger does plague you rather a lot. It likes to slide up to you when you’re watching TV like ‘er, have you seen the size of your to-do list? How can you possibly think you have time to watch Line of Duty?!’ FYI – there is always time to watch Line of Duty.
High: The opportunities to spend time with people you love and the love these people want to show you. By far one of my favourite parts about the whole process. Days out with my mum, a whole weekend with my best of friends, random occasions where you can use the whole thing as an excuse to celebrate… even if it’s just a Wednesday afternoon. And people do some of the cutest things for you – little gifts, little gestures – simply because you are getting married. It’s all bloody lovely.
Low: WHY IS IT SO FUCKING EXPENSIVE? Nuff said.
High: IT’S EXCITING. And fun. And, yes, sometimes a little weird. At the end of the day, I get to throw a massive party, go on an epic holiday and marry the person I love. And that's just grand.
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