When you have to book brunch in advance, the fact that the only table you can get is at 9:30am on a Saturday doesn't really phase you. It's too far away for you to think about it.
But then the Saturday arrives and you've had a hard (well...) working week and you have to leave the house at 8:30am cos travel in London and it's snowing IN MARCH.
Nah.
But you can't be 'nah' about Duck & Waffle. It's probably illegal. And that would be because it really is too cool for school... don't let me say that again.
Duck & Waffle, if you haven't picked up on the trend yet, is a pretty incredible restaurant located on the top floor of a forty-floor skyscraper in London. You have to book forever in advance and going up in the super-fast lift gives you vertigo but that really is the only downside; go get yo ass up there.
For starters, it goes without saying really, the view is incredible whichever way you look, although I particularly enjoyed being sat on the side of the gherkin basically cos you're looking DOWN on it and that makes you feel like you are somewhere important. What a cute little baby skyscraper you.
The actual restaurant is pretty simple décor-wise; but with those floor-to-ceiling windows, it doesn't need to be anything more. The bar area though, has so much to gaze at. LOOK AT THAT FLOOR. And those bottles on the ceiling, and those sparkles hanging there, and that wall and I just used up all my iPhone memory taking photos. My bad.
However, the main event is obviously the food (isn't it always?). We started (yes started) with a full English for G and poached eggs on sourdough toast for moi. This was the start of the waiter judging me. He raised an eyebrow when I ordered and said 'is that all?'
Well excuse me for being modest with my breakfast.
Hands down, best poached eggs I've ever had. They literally bounced they were so fresh and the yolk was so, well, orange. But you know, like, orangeorange.
After I'd wolfed down my bouncy eggs (stop it), the waiter asked if we would like anything else.
Yes.
Yes I would.
You see, I lied when I said I was being modest with my food.
This was the main event. I'd heard the stories, I'd prepared myself...
'I'll have the Full Elvis waffle please.'
Cue more serious eyebrow raising from the waiter. G orders the English cherries waffle, somewhat more sensibly.
A minute later, the waiter comes back to check that I'm aware that the Full Elvis is a full-sized waffle and then hastily assures me that I've made the best choice when I give him my 'yes, and...?' look. Defs judging me a lil bit.
But, seriously, I really did make the best choice. I mean, LOOK AT IT.
Admittedly, G got flowers on his which I didn't but that was only cos I had EVERYTHING else. Peanut butter, jam, caramelized bananas, blueberries, raspberries,blackberries, strawberries, nuts, chantilly cream, chocolate... Oh my god was it good.
Those berries; they were huge! And so fresh!
Hashtag food porn.
Quite frankly, if the waffle doesn't make you want to go to Duck & Waffle, then I don't know what will. Jokes aside; the service we received was spot on and the waiter was very willing to chat with us about the food and answer our questions about the restaurant.
Slightly bizarrely, it's open 24/7 so naturally I'm going to have to go back at 4am and be the most pretentious drunk person in the history of forever. Cheesy chips? No, darling, let's pop into that lovely restaurant at the top of a skyscraper and grab some chantilly cream.
After we'd paid the bill (which wasn't cheap but you're treating yourself), we had a bit of a mooch around the local area where G wandered and I took photos. It was eerily quiet for London but that was probably a good thing because we spent most of the time looking up because oh my so much cool architecture.
After a minor tantrum on my part because we passed two Waterstones and they were both CLOSED and having a little freak out because we got an email from the landlord saying we had the flat we wanted (*victory dance*), we popped over to 20 Fenchurch street, AKA the Walkie Talkie to continue our tour of skyscrapers with a trip to the Sky Garden.
This is another one you need to book in advance but tickets are free so you definitely need to be adding it to your to-do-in-London list.
After faffing your way through security, you whizz up in another lift Charlie-and-the-chocolate-factory-style (where your ears pop big time) and emerge in what feels like an enormous green house. Only there's a cafe and views of the Shard.
You can mooch around as you please; check out the plants and views, chill in the cafe (obviously, I had a waffle food coma so didn't go anywhere near the food... but it looked good so I'll still recommend it...) and there's a balcony for you to go and stare at the view at your heart's content.
Whilst I realise this photo is kinda dark, I'm scared to edit it in case it reveals I was walking around with bits of peanut butter all over my face... which I probably was.
Eventually there will come a point you feel skyscrapered out, and this is where you can go home and collapse on the sofa for the rest of the day, all the while contemplating how you can recreate that waffle for breakfast on Sunday.
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